asmitā - my numerous identities

I am a chauffeur.

I am a cook.

I am a conflict resolver.

I am a cleaning lady.

I am a motivational speaker.

I am a diplomat.

I am a dictator.

I am a dog walker.

 

I am a mom, a wife, a woman, a person, a living being.

 

I am a teacher.

I am a student.

I am an art collector.

I am an explorer.

I am a friend.

 

In the eyes of the beholder,

I am.

 

So many hats to wear, such big shoes to fill. Thinking about all my different roles reminds me of Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra 1.2: yogaḥ-citta-vr̥tti-nirodhaḥ - Yoga is the stilling of the activities of the mind. . We have so many voices (roles) in our head, constantly clamoring and cluttering up our mental space. How do we put them all aside so that we can hear the most important voice of all? The voice of intuition, the voice of knowing, our little guide who leads us to peace and quiet joy.

The time that I devote to my Yoga practice each morning gives me the opportunity to do just that. The early mornings are quiet, serene, and have a special quality. When I begin my practice, the peaceful environment draws into my mind and body and I am able to move with intention, while observing and listening to my self. I notice subtle shifts in my state - a yawn here, a swallow there. I know I am moving in the right direction.

As I transition from my physical practice to my pranayama, I can hear it. The little voice, which carries the same special quality as the early morning does - it is quiet and peaceful. It does not scream for attention like my other roles do, it sits back and waits for me to find it. When I begin my meditation practice, the knowing grows stronger - and if my meditation is moving in the right direction, that voice can even take over my self.

I slowly peel away the layers of distraction - no longer am I mother, wife, friend. No longer am I me or my self. I am connected with the divine, with the very element that connects us to all of nature and all of life. There is no time, there is only space. And in this space I am free.